A podcast that focuses on business, health, and mindset would not be complete without the advice and perspective of today’s guest, Dr. Shyamala KiruDr. Kiru is a family and couple’s therapist who has been in practice for over a decade. The focus of her work is on how to develop high-performance relationships — whether it’s with your boss, your friends, your kids, or with your partner. 

On today’s episode, we really delve into the ways of thinking that get us into trouble within our relationships. You’ll really be surprised by some of them! But not only do we talk about all the things we are doing wrong, but we also talk about some of the key things that we can do to actually get us out of trouble when it comes to relationships! Dr. Shyamala Kiru also goes through the key characteristics of high-performance couples, as well as some of the key features they have that not only enable them to have incredible relationships but a heightened degree of intimacy and trust. 

Today’s conversation was so incredibly interesting — as well as important to all of us! If you want to learn how to get past your limiting beliefs, conquer your toxic thoughts, and tap into the qualities that make for high-performance relationships — tune in! 

Key Takeaways: 

[:54] About today’s episode and guest! 

[2:25] Welcoming Dr. Shyamala Kiru to the podcast! 

[3:20] Dr. Kiru gives a look into her journey both personally and professionally and explains how she came to be passionate about unlocking people’s high-performance relationships. 

[5:33] What does it actually mean to have a mature relationship? 

[7:55] Why do most of us struggle to own our needs and express them confidently within our relationships? 

[9:10] What are we so scared of as women to be assertive and ask people for what we really want? 

[11:25] How do we get past this passiveness and fear of rejection as women? 

[17:02] What are some of the thinking traps and assumptions that we make that get in the way of us having high-performance relationships? 

[19:11] What does it mean to do work on yourself? Where should we start? 

[21:27] Dr. Kiru gives an example of a trapping thought and how she helps people get through it. 

[25:29] What if you can’t slow down to stop these toxic thoughts in their tracks? 

[27:05] Dr. Kiru highlights some of the most common thinking traps women fall into and how they impact ourselves and our relationships. 

[30:33] Can we use ? (i.e. instead of catastrophizing, visualizing a positive future) 

[34:00] Dr. Kiru highlights some more common thinking traps we fall into! 

[34:57] What are some of the things we do in our relationship that really keep us from having a high-performance relationship? 

[37:03] What are the features of high-performance relationships that make them high-performance? 

[42:24] Have the high-performance couples that Dr. Kiru has seen already done ‘the work’ or are they currently working to improve themselves and their relationship? 

[45:25] What is step one for us to move towards having high-performance relationships? 

[48:02] Dr. Shyamala Kiru’s key performance indicators! 

[51:50] Where to learn more about Dr. Kiru and her work online! 

Mentioned in This Episode: 

A Mind of Your Own: The Truth About Depression and How Women Can Heal Their Bodies to Reclaim Their Lives, by Kelly Brogan, M.D. and Kristen Loberg 

KiruWellness.com/MindsetAudit — Visit Dr. Kiru’s website to see how your high-performance habits rank up! 

Dr. Kiru’s Instagram: @Dr.ShyamalaKiru 

More About Dr. Shyamala Kiru 

Dr. Shyamala Kiru is a Mindset & Relationship Expert, trained as a Registered Psychotherapist and a Registered Couple & Family Therapist, focused on the emotional and relational optimization of women and their families. Shyamala is the founder and director of the Kiru Wellness Clinic, a mental health practice dedicated to the treatment of the entire family system. 

 Shyamala is a media expert, having appeared on a national television show for nearly a decade and consults for publications such as Chatelaine, the Toronto Star and the Globe and Mail. She spent several years serving on the Board of Directors for the Ontario Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. Most importantly, she is the Chief Inspiring Officer to her incredible daughter. 

Connect with my Guest: 

Website: KiruWellness.com 

Social Media: Instagram and Twitter 

If you enjoyed our conversation and would like to hear more: 

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What if I told you that your brain biochemistry can help amplify your mindset and your capacity to be effective and help accelerate your mission in the world? Well, I’ve pulled together a very quick checklist so that you can have a better understanding of the things you’re doing every single day to amplify your nervous system or downregulate it in a way that isn’t necessarily serving your mission. If you want access to this information and want to learn a little bit more about how you can optimize your brain health for success, visit: MeghanWalker.com/BrainHealth to grab your handout now! 


Want to start having high-performance relationships with your business partners, your kids, your friends, and your partnership? Luckily, Dr. Shyamala Kiru has given us so many practical tips and steps you can take from today’s episode! Start by identifying your toxic thoughts and self-limiting beliefs, make a list of the things you can and cannot control, and then put into action the things you can control. It’s that simple. Once you put that all into practice it becomes easier. So let us know what steps you will be taking to take your relationships to the next level by following up with us on the The Entrepology Podcast Facebook page — because when you’re accountable, you’re helpable! 


“The fascinating part about my journey as a clinician is realizing and recognizing that “Without addressing the mindset piece and the communication piece, it’s virtually impossible to have healthy, fulfilling, and authentic relationships.” — Dr. Shyamala Kiru 


“Really where it all starts is with our thoughts. It all starts with our thinking and what we don’t do is slow down enough to actually identify what’s going on in our heads.”[Text Wrapping Break]— Dr. Shyamala Kiru 


“What is causing that feeling of overwhelm is what you are saying to yourself about all of the events in your life that are leaving you feeling overwhelmed.” [Text Wrapping Break]— Dr. Shyamala Kiru 


“Of the 75,000 thoughts we have per day, 98% of them are simply repeated from the day before. We’re repeating the same toxic thoughts, the same limiting-beliefs over and over and over again because we’re not slowing down!” — Dr. Shyamala Kiru 


“Negotiating and navigating togetherness and separateness well is really, really important.” — Dr. Shyamala Kiru